89 Week Old Baby: Your Baby's Development and Your Recovery This Week

Your toddler feels a lot this week, and they need you as their safe place to feel it.

At around 21–22 months, your toddler is starting to notice other people's emotions. They'll look concerned if a baby cries, brighten up at a happy voice they know, and look at your face to check whether to be scared of the loud vacuum. Their own emotions, angry, upset, excited, jealous, come in strong, and they need your validation to make sense of them.

• Name feelings out loud, often. "You look disappointed." "Papa is tired." "That was a happy laugh."
• Don't rush past a feeling, even if it seems small to you. The cracked biscuit really was a tragedy to your toddler.
• Keep your own reactions calm. Your toddler reads your face and copies it.

• Your toddler may insist only on mama (or only on papa) for a few weeks at a time. That's a phase, not a rejection. Both parents keep showing up kindly, the favourite swaps again soon enough.

• A toddler who doesn't look at faces for comfort, doesn't share emotions (no smile-back, no bringing things to show you), or doesn't seek you out when hurt, worth mentioning at the next well-visit.

• Tantrums going past 25 minutes regularly, head-banging that breaks skin, or breath-holding spells, mention these at the next pediatrician visit.

Being someone's safe place is tiring work, and you do it with a calm you did not know you had. Noticing feelings, checking your face before the vacuum roars: these tender skills are real 21 month old baby milestones too. The comfort you give now becomes the confidence they carry later.

Around 21 months. Anxiety in mums often shows up sharper around year 2, when the early adrenaline wears off.

What postpartum anxiety looks like at year 2

• Constant background worry about your toddler's safety
• Trouble sleeping because thoughts keep cycling
• Catastrophising, assuming the worst will happen
• Physical symptoms: racing heart, tight chest, breathlessness
• Avoidance, not wanting to leave the house, drive, see people

This is treatable. Often within 6–8 sessions of CBT, or with short-term medication.

Things that help in the meantime

• Exercise (daily walk, yoga)
• cardio is one of the strongest natural anxiety reducers
• Cutting caffeine (chai, coffee) by half if you're sensitive
• A breathwork practice
• 4-7-8 breathing, anulom-vilom, bhramari
• Less news, less social media, less doom-scrolling
• A weekly check-in with a friend or therapist

Indian-context options for therapy

• A trained therapist or specialist clinic can help. Stable blood sugar = stable nerves.

Worth flagging

• Panic attacks (sudden onset, racing heart, sense of doom, can't breathe) are treatable, often quickly. Don't wait. Talk to a psychiatrist or therapist. Anxiety responds well to treatment, much faster than depression often does. You don't have to live with this.

Indian-tradition tip for anxious nights

• A few minutes of bhramari (humming bee breath) lying in bed before sleep, slow exhale with a humming sound, calms the nervous system. Pairs well with a glass of warm milk and a foot massage. Not a replacement for therapy when needed, but a kind self-care moment.

If worry has been sitting heavy on your chest, please know that reaching out for help is strength, not weakness. Looking after your own mind is the deepest form of mother self care there is. You deserve to feel calm in your own life, not just keep it running for everyone else.